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| Biggest sister, little brother. Hand in hand. |
Then came my standard reply: "He's actually 11 weeks old. He was almost 7 weeks premature so he's small."
It hit me shortly after, I often forget he's premmie. It doesn't really affect the way I treat him or think about him. I did realise though that maybe this is the fatigue that I'm feeling. I'm feeling like I've had a newborn for a really long time. In some ways I have.
He's 12 weeks now and he's only really just starting smile and respond. He's only just getting a bit of head control. He doesn't look 'freaky' as a lot of people say they think he might. He's 4.5kg so not tiny small, but definitely small for a 12-week-old baby. He looks like a large 5-week-old baby, which is what he essentially is.
Yesterday, I saw a baby that was a full-term 11-week-old and I felt a pang of sadness. Stupid really as I have nothing to be sad about. D is healthy now, doing well. I don't expect more out of him than I should, but seeing that baby made me realise how he's not a "normal" 12-week-old baby. This 11-week-old was so much more advanced than he was. I realised that this newborn phase is going to go on for a while longer. That the arsenic hour phase probably will go on for another 6 or so weeks. I've got a 'bonus' 7 weeks of newborn-ness.
I adore him and I'm enjoying him, but I feel like I'm running a marathon. Deep breath, dig deep, keep on going.
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Oh my god. That's maths ... you DO have extra weeks of newbornland. Oh mate. Sending you virtual coffee and Chickadees.
ReplyDeleteOne day he'll be tearing around doing boy stuff.
(In my head, I sang the title of this post as the lyrics to "Neverending Story.")
Ah ha ha, oh hah hah, oh hah .... Neverending New boooooooooorn.
XX
Eeeesh. Sounds tough. But as you say, a happy and healthy baby is the main thing indeed. And he is beautiful at that. Trying to enjoy my last weeks before the newborn madness sets in.... xx
ReplyDeleteOh that photo Corinne, just gorgeous :o)
ReplyDeleteYes, I didn't think of it that way, of course you're going to have extra newborn weeks, it stands to reason... though doesn't make it any easier on Mama.
You're doing a great job Corinne and such a wonderful service to your little man, he is lucky to have such a loving, devoted Mama.
Isn't it funny how things work out, because my boys were both so big, they were only in newborn clothes for less than a week, before skipping straight to the 000's. And strangely enough, I feel like I was deprived of the precious newborn size... and of course EVERYONE would tell me that the boys didn't look like newborns, which didn't help.
By the time they're about 3, they'll all look pretty much the same and be doing the same things. Ironic really. Keep going hun :o) xo
Um, I've run a marathon (don't mention it often. do I??!!) - and what you are doing is a trillion times more challenging, exhausting and relentless.
ReplyDeleteHonest.
What you are doing is also a trillion times more fabulous and brag-worthy.
One foot in front of the other, breathe in, breathe out... you'll make it.
:-)