* Disclaimer: This is a vent. To get it out of my system. Not a cry for help. I'm writing purely so I don't take it out on my kids, husband or anyone else who crosses my path. If you don't feel like reading a 'woe is me' post over something that is not that important, please feel free to click out now.
Life is stressful at the moment.
We're about to put our home on the market, we're trying to make our home perfect so that someone will fall in love with it and want to buy it. There's so much to do, so many things we've let go over the years. We moved in when I was 8 months pregnant, two days later I was put on bed rest for the final month with pregnancy-induced hypertension, ever since there have been bigger priorities than getting the house just the way I want it. This has frustrated me over the years, but what are you going to do?
Now I have just a couple of days to make it perfect. I feel the pressure weighing down on me like a ton of bricks. Skip is doing a great job getting ready, but he has a huge amount on his plate at work too.
Goosey has been sick, last night she would only sleep fitfully lying on me, waking crying often for 'water, milk, a band-aid for my nose'. She's miserable, I'm exhausted. Now, my dodgy back has gone out from her sleeping on me. Plus I spend my day trying not to chuck. Woe is me.
While I clean, pack, tidy, organise one part of the house, the girls fight and destroy another part of it. It's frustrating and I'm going round and round in circles. This morning I freaked out as the real estate agent sent a stylist to give us some tips. As I was tidying, the kids were untidying. Hobbling round with a sore back I can't take anything for, stomach churning, hormones raging, so bloody tired, worrying about selling, worrying about where we're going to move to – I burst into tears and sobbed.
I feel like I'm not achieving anything. I'm not super woman, nowhere near, but I should be able to do a bit better.
Now it's time to suck it up, get on with it and know that it will work out one way or another. Most of all realise that I'm pretty damn lucky to have these problems.